To the girl who....

To the girl that would dye her hair any colour she wanted,

who listened to music for hours on end and dreamed of a life of travel,

who’s eyes were greedy to see anything new,

who’s every sense within her  wanted to taste, touch…..feel…my god feel

Where is she now…?

Do you remember the clear-cut moment she died…or did it happen over time? Little by little….such small killings that it was a few years before you comprehend…

Yes she has gone.

What made you so frightened to be who you wanted to be….what happened to make you so afraid? Was it one monumental event that will haunt you forever….or was it just the drip drip drip of

 “Do the right thing”

“Be sensible”

 “That job will give you security”

“Buying a house will give you a good investment…in around 40 years….and the sooner you start paying into it the better”

That counsels you to keep safe

To keep you secure

To make sure your head does not raise above the barricades

Or your feet lift from the ground

Firmly….well placed….well secured feet…

Keep grounded

Be safe

How does it feel to fail miserably at playing it safe?

Would that girl with the just freshly-changed-awful-hair colour recognise you, would she thank you for keeping her safe with a nice investment….

Or would she cry

Would she pack a bag for you and say

 “just do it….just be who you should be, what good is there in failing at something that didn’t make you happy…did that fill your soul...and then pour

and pour and pour

until it over-flowed…..

and that overflow went into your children…your family…your friends…your lover…your passion”

Fat, thin, shy, bonkers, outgoing, introverted, career driven, home maker, traveller, home bird, doesn’t give a shit, gives too much of a shit…

Whatever you have been labelled, I don’t really care…it is what makes you smile that interests me, what makes your heart yearn, what dreams you have that are so massive they scare you..

Be fearless

You fragile beautiful creature

Be your own kind of warrior

You are woman

You are beautiful